Sunday, May 3, 2009

Hugs and Kisses from Kirk and Spock

The net is buzzing about some of the plot points from the new Star Trek movie, a key one involving romance. (So as not to be tossing spoilers about, we'll warn you that if you click here or here or especially here you'll find out what we're talking about.) We've been intrigued at The Flaming Nose with preview scenes featuring saucy and hilarious dialogue, and we think it's darn smart of J.J. Abrams et al to have figured out that the Enterprise crew's sex lives are of keen interest to the fans out there. Feh to folks who have carped that the new gang makes it looks like Star Trek 90210 -- are you kidding? Some of us can't WAIT to see these folks jump into the sack!

Let's not forget that when Star Trek: The Original Series was first on the air, like all good 1960s-era adventure TV series it had its share of romantic plot elements. Much merriment has been made over the years concerning Captain Kirk's supposed incessant womanizing -- really, he didn't kiss every alien lady he came across -- and though you can count the number of times Spock fell for somebody on less than one hand, we'll never forget them. We figure it's about time to give a little tribute to the softer side of our favorite Star Trek heroes.

Though he was far from a cad, James T. Kirk was definitely a lover as well as a fighter. From his kiss (above, left) with the lovely android Andrea (played by Sherry Jackson) in "What Are Little Girls Made Of?" to his attraction (above, right) to Kodos the Executioner's daughter (Barbara Anderson) in "Conscience of the King", or maybe his dalliance (left) with the alternative universe's Captain's Woman (Barbara Luna) in "Mirror, Mirror", or his romantic manipulation (right) of the Kelvan invader Kelinda (Barbara Bouchet) in "By Any Other Name", Kirk liked the ladies. We also can't forget the bizarrely-costumed yet historic kiss between Kirk and Lt. Uhura in "Plato's Stepchildren", and the amnesia-induced idyll with the Native American beauty Miramanee (Sabrina Scharf) in "The Paradise Syndrome", and that's just skimming a few off the top for Kirk. We loved him for it, too, and a Kirk without an active libido wouldn't be quite right.

Because of the rarity of Spock's romantic encounters, each one was a real special occasion, at least for the Spock fans out there. We had the long-standing and mostly unrequited attraction of Nurse Christine Chapel for Spock, in evidence especially in "The Naked Time" where a virus caught everybody with their emotions hanging out, in "Amok Time" when she made Spock some Plomik Soup and had a strange, intimate conversation with him in his cabin, in "A Private Little War" when she holds his hand as he's unconscious in a Vulcan healing trance, and of course in "Plato's Stepchildren" when they are forced to kiss by the Platonians. Not quite what she wanted, but better than nothing, we'd think.

In terms of non-workplace relationships, we had Spock's reunion with Leila Kalomi (Jill Ireland) in "This Side of Paradise", where in addition to kissing a girl Spock also gets to hang from a tree like a chimp. Bravo on both counts! We can't again ignore the total Vulcan sexuality-infused "Amok Time" where we meet Spock's betrothed T'Pring (Arlene Martel) and also catch him at his computer almost creepily gazing at her picure as a child. (Always thought that was a bit weird!).

How about his out-of-character flirtation with the skinnier-than-skinny spoiled aristobrat Droxine (Diana Ewing) in "The Cloud Minders"? I was always fascinated by it, but thought it completely ridiculous and highly illogical, albeit almost hilarious. Much better was Spock's James Bond-ian undercover seduction of the Romulan Commander (Joanne Linville) in "The Enterprise Incident". Not only they did look good together, but as distant racial relatives they shared unearthly foreplay techniques which were good for endless speculation.

Mainly because I've always loved actress Mariette Hartley, I'm partial to Spock's unlikely but nearly plausible -- thanks to time travel -- infatuation with Zarabeth in "All Our Yesterdays". It's also got that wrenching doomed romance farewell scene, this time played in blowing snow, which gives it kind of a Doctor Zhivago-esque air. Quite memorable overall!

I think that's about all for now, so I'm hoping the new movie will add more nooky to the Star Trek canon. Love makes the world...the universe...go round!


Jane said...

And let us not forget the time Kirk almost robbed the cradle by flirting with Kim Darby in the episode "Miri", where "grups" were the bad guys because they got a disease involving a blue sore that turned them crazy.

Bring on the Star Trek sex scenes. I honestly wish the movie was rated "R"!

Fabulous post Lisa!

Lisa said...

Oh, yes...forgot about Miri! I need to do a follow-up -- i also forgot to mention Edith Keeler!

I doubt we're the only near-menopausal ladies wishing this Trek were really sexy! God, I hope we're not the only ones!

I'm still hoping that someday I'll be able to make Plomik soup for Mr. Spock! :-)

Jane said...

Ha ha ha! What do you supposed the recipe for Plomik soup is? I think I will do a post where I imagine the ingredients for this delicasy!